Thursday, December 29, 2005

at work

yesterday at work i spent the first hour trying to figure that best position to make it look like i was working, but to actually be sleeping. i think having my left hand support my head, while sheilding my face from the door and placing my right hand on the keyboard is best.

then one of the doctors walked in and all i could think about was not farting. i didn't even have to, but then i started thinking about it and i got nervous.

then i drank as much green tea as possible (like 7 mug fulls) only to make sure my afternoon work would be interrupted by constant bathroom breaks.

then i had to pee every five minutes for the next hour or so.

then i stared at the fax machine for a while. so everyone who works with me made some inane cliche comment about the level of skill needed to fax a document.

then i highlighted and unhighlighted the same paragraph on the computer for at least twenty minutes.

then i hid in the file room.

then it was time to go.
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Anonymous Shtick said...

Didn't Rory's boyfriend do that at the local supermarket?

5:02 PM  
Blogger David said...

If this is what office work is like, maybe I should just drop out of college now to avoid ever beign qualified to work in an office.

5:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i wanted to post on monday december 26th because there are no comments and it looks lonely then i got worried that you wouldnt see the post but then i got worried if you saw that i posted on this one youd be like well that was a waste of time why didnt you post on "new diet" instead of just talking about it and id hate myself and crumple like a deflated it's a boy balloon hanging on the bedpost of a woman who just miscarried and all i could hear was my fathers voice in my head telling me you got no backbone, kid. is this post too long ive never commented before on anyones blog not because i havent wanted to but just because i am too shy like i think my hands get a little sweaty when i think about posting a comment so i usually go wash them then come back but my hands are still wet from washing them so its kind didnt i just wash my hands so i wouldnt get the keyboard wet?

6:26 PM  

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