Monday, May 02, 2011

an interesting turn of events

In an interesting turn of events, both Finance and Big Brother are in India this week.  Big Brother is still en route, but Finance arrived two days ago.  It is an interesting turn of events because Osama Bin Laden was just killed (murdered? assasinated?).  Here is what Finance wrote me this morning from his phone:

I think I must start by saying that being in a majority Muslim area of India hearing this news has not given me any particular insight. Rather, perhaps selfishly or naïvely, I feel more uneasy about the event than I would have had I been safely at home in New York. I heard the news less than a day after reaching Hyderabad and it hit me a blow not unlike the oppressive heat and pervasive poverty here. At first I was bewildered and elated, but then, and this is when the selfishness kicked in, I realized that this put me in a precarious situation. I was mere moments from leaving my hotel to take in the madness of a nearby Indian market, but realized that being an American abroad had changed to include a level of danger that hadn't existed mere hours before. My fears were confirmed by the American State Department by way of a strongly worded warning for US residents abroad to stay in their homes. In an interesting turn of fate, that was out of the question for me as I had minutes earlier checked out of my hotel and had a few hours to kill before I could meet up with a friend of a friend who's apartment I would be staying at for the remainder of my time in India. I tried to unobtrusively sit in the lobby of the hotel to plan my next move. This was effective for a while but then I began to get constant requests by increasingly well dressed employees as to when they could arrange a taxi to take me away. I must admit that I was a little panicky. I could not impart the State Department warning or my own, perhaps unjust, fears upon anyone. Eventually a dapper fellow in a suit insisted upon knowing my plans. I told him I would just wait a while longer, then eat lunch there (so as not to appear to be a freeloader) and he looked at me incredulously,  this being hours before the restaurant would open. I was wondering how these people felt about the death of Osama Bin Laden and what they thought of this ridiculous American trying to hide in their lobby. Eventually I hit upon the idea of asking if their bar was open. I could use a drink, both in celebration and out of the erroneous assumption that it would calm my nerves. They were amenable, if slightly nonplussed about opening their bar at 10 am to a single patron. I then took up residence in their dark bar, nursing Kingfisher beers, and eventually writing this rambling missive on my phone. I turned on the television and began to consume news reports along with my beer. Hours before they would even wake or hear the news, I sent confident messages to my fiancée and family saying I was fine and keeping my head down, to not worry about me and that I loved them. I began guessing that this was a gross overreaction to the situation, but it soothed my nerves and I'm hoping theirs. What somewhat helped me cope with this newfound uncertainty was the arrival in the dark bar of the hotel management. Three impeccably dressed Indian men who came in and harangued the bartender, the only words I understood were CNN and TV. After flipping channels for a while, they then asked where I was from, and upon hearing the reply lit up in smiles and began vigorously slapping me on the back and shaking my hand saying how happy they were in India and how, again erroneously assuming at least in part, that I was drinking this early in celebration of this momentous event. Perhaps the most striking facet of the Indian news coverage has been the villainization of Pakistan. Headlines kept flashing: PAK's Lies Exposed, ISI Builds Mansion for Osama? and Pakistan Caught Red Handed?. I wondered if this had something to do with the positive reactions and distinctive head wobbling of the Indians I spoke with. As I write this one of the men in suits returned and said, "Big celebrations in US, yes?" With my poor imitation head wobble I said yes big celebrations and started to explain that I was also nervous about potential reprisals, but quickly realized that the language barrier was too great to convey anything but feeble agreement. Again and again I saw images of Washington and New York in the throes of celebration. If I were at home I would have enjoyed, if not joined in the celebration, but sitting here in Hyderabad, I just felt uncomfortable with the death of a prominent Muslim, despite his mass murder and general loathsomeness. I worry about martyrdom, and retribution, but perhaps as an American who's father has spent extensive time in Afghanistan in recent years and like many Americans keenly felt the blow of 9/11, I should just embrace the positive. Whether Pakistan will now be declared a terrorist state or this will effectively end the "War on Terror" I can't say. All I can say is that a monster has been excised from the world and because of my own situation I can't tell how to feel about it.
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Friday, April 22, 2011

hello the loves

hello the loves,
please note. i did not have time to eat lunch. but i am currently enjoying a luke warm Yuengling at my work desk. so if you have any question as to my state of mind, it's low blood sugar/drunk.

but what's important, is that you know, that i know, that this isn't as good as it gets. it gets gooder. it gets better. we have more life than these 20 minutes before work is over on a friday. we have weekend. we are the weekend.

we, as people, are weekends. we are hope, we are aspirations, we are home projects that we will never actually be accomplished, we are 10 am yoga classes that we won't go to, we are sleeping in late, we are late smoky nights, we are laughs that are louder than they should be, we are sunday nights in pajamas, we are "making some time to read" but instead watching tv marathons, we are drunk brunches, we are not work days.

so take these 20 minutes and stick it up someone else's ass.

love,
khammarin
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Thursday, April 14, 2011

full on rant

what the fuck? TURN OFF YOUR LAMP IN YOUR OFFICE WHEN YOU GO HOME.

we all know the earth is going to shit, right? and it's because humans are sloppy and wasteful.  there was a psa on the other day about turning off the water while you brush your teeth, and Finance was all "i think we get it by now, we have heard that since we were kids."

well, apparently, no. apparently, we still need reminders to turn off lights and the water when YOU ARE NOT USING IT.

it blows my mind.  everyone is a bunch of terrible babies.

on a side note: to the man in the kitchen area talking about your passion for music turned into a career. you can also go to hell.  i mean, great for you, i am sure you are super happy. but the sake of the rest of us, go to hell.

on a side side note: i think i accidently dressed like an old woman today.
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Monday, March 28, 2011

couch

after a years long campaign i finally fulfilled my drunken wish of sleeping on the couch.

you see for some time now, Finance has made me go into the bedroom, mere feet away from the couch when i get just a little drunk. but i want to sleep on the couch. the couch seems so much more comfortable, so much more convenient, so much more like where i am already sleeping.

and this weekend he finally let me do it.

and while my back hurts from the contortions to make my body fit, and Finance had to check on me every couple minutes to make sure i wasn't dead. i think it was worth it.

now, i did get up at 6 am and move into the bed, but still. i accomplished my goal, which was being so ornery when drunk that even the person who loves me the most gives up, and lets me sleep on a very uncomfortable surface.

it only took 8 and 1/2 years!

ta-da!
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Saturday, March 26, 2011

saturday post

this won't happen a lot. but i am just so excited to be back on blogging that i am posting on saturday.

now, granted, not much as changed since yesterday.

but! listen to this story that no one cares about! i was walking to the subway from work the other day, and there was this dude wearing sunglasses and a hood, and had a super long beard. he was kind of staring at me, probably because i was wearing my green hat which is very striking.  so i was staring back at him.

then i realized the man he was walking with was Theirry Guetta, or Mr. Brainwash. and i got the most star struck i have ever been in my whole life. and one time i saw Dennis Rodman at the mall when i was in junior high.

i thought about following them, which was weird because what would happen then? i just follow two dudes for a couple blocks and then what? we become best friends? so i got on the subway instead.

the point of all of this, is that i have convinced myself i saw Banksy.
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Friday, March 25, 2011

fuck it

i tried tumblr. and i like tumblr.

but i miss my blog. this is a straight up legit blog. it says blog in the web addy. on tumblr you can just re-blog someone else's picture, and you posted content.

but i have rambling incoherent thoughts that need to expressed, and then fake commented on by me.

so i am back to blogspot. boo-ya bitches, i am back.

i am back to write about how bored i am at work. i am back to write about what i ate for lunch. i am back to pretend like i have a sense of purpose in life.

coming back to blogspot actually really makes me feel like this blog was something more than a free website i set up in 2006. it's like something that could be important, because i left it and came back.

you know what that means, right? true love. i set my blog free, or my blog set me free... either way one of us was free or both of us were free, but now we have decided to come back. so, it's true love.

also, it's friday, so you know what that means, fake comment friday.
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Friday, July 09, 2010

TUMBLR

AT THE MOMENT I HAVE MOVED TO TUMBLR.  Who knows if it will be forever. 

www.gilmoregurlz.tumblr.com
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