at work

yesterday at work i spent the first hour trying to figure that best position to make it look like i was working, but to actually be sleeping. i think having my left hand support my head, while sheilding my face from the door and placing my right hand on the keyboard is best.

then one of the doctors walked in and all i could think about was not farting. i didn't even have to, but then i started thinking about it and i got nervous.

then i drank as much green tea as possible (like 7 mug fulls) only to make sure my afternoon work would be interrupted by constant bathroom breaks.

then i had to pee every five minutes for the next hour or so.

then i stared at the fax machine for a while. so everyone who works with me made some inane cliche comment about the level of skill needed to fax a document.

then i highlighted and unhighlighted the same paragraph on the computer for at least twenty minutes.

then i hid in the file room.

then it was time to go.

chris singel

i hate chris singel. and i blocked him on aim for a while, but then i figured he didn't know i was blocking him and probably thought i signed off. so i unblocked him and now i'm just not talking to him. i didn't want to blog twice today, but chris made me because blogging has turned out to be a great emotional release. and i didn't have any where else to turn.

p.s. i lost three pounds today.

p.p.s. that's a lie.

p.p.p.s. i wish i didn't lie so much.

p.p.p.p.s. maybe...

mom's

it's early in the morning 7:55 am. i have only been up for five minutes and i have already been bitchy to my mom. granted she was bitchy first, but i guess i shouldn't hide the car keys when people have to go somewhere. YEAH CUZ I REALLY DID IT ON PURPOSE, BECAUSE I LOVE TO HIDE CAR KEYS AFTER I HAVE BEEN RUNNING ERRANDS FOR A MOTHER-I-KNOW BECAUSE SHE'S TOO BUSY HAVING A SUCCESSFUL CAREER TO TAKE CARE OF HER FAMILY. anyways i think i will have cookies for breakfast.

new diet

i have a new post christmas diet. its a fiber based diet. so far today i have eaten shredded wheat and entire can of refried beans. tomorrow about this time i will drink a venti coffee and smoke a pack of cigarettes. the hour after that will be one of the most painful/weightlifting moments of my life. i can't wait.

christmas

today is christmas. my little brother told me he heard my parents talking about a new puppy they got us for christmas. i knew it was a lie but i couldn't help believing it. we didn't get a puppy. i wanted a new cell phone for christmas. and i openned a present and it was a cell phone box with a scarf inside. boy was i surprised. we all had a good laugh at my expense. wow i love christmas.

p.s. my new cell phone number is 1- (dry)- clean-only.

i changed my mind

i changed my mind, i am still scared to die. so i take that last blog session back. sorry.

death

i have been thinking a lot about death lately. and i'm not scared to go any more.

first blog

i am at work. and this is my first blog. i think its appropriate to be at work during my first blog because from what i understand a lot of people blog at work. i made this blog because a guy i know auditioned for the gilmore girls. and i wanted to tell him that i like the show. and i didn't think i would ever use this thing again, but i am bored at work, and now look at me.