Monday, February 12, 2007

A Letter

Dear Valentine's Day,
Congratulations. You have succeded as a holiday. Why? Because you have wormed your way into the heart of the weak minded and the competitive, and it just so happens that women are both. You have made people doubt and question their relationships based on the gifts they receive. And you have set up a sort of competition for the best/most extravagent gift. You have made people send flowers to offices, where there shouldn't be anything living remotely close to the shit hole we spend our days in. You make us buy chocolate for people, who trust me, DO NOT NEED ANY MORE CHOCOLATE. But most of all, Valetine's Day, you have flooded CVS with crap, which doesn't mean much because Easter does too, but all I want are some Q-tips. But I can't fucking find them because you need 14 aisles of red crap and stuffed animals. What are you going to do with all those stupid stuffed animals? I don't want that laying around my house, I'm not 4. But if I get one then its a gift and I can't throw it away, and that's the worst. Although, you have one repreive, I really like those giant cards. I don't want one, and I am not going to buy one for someone else. But in general I think oversized things are funny.

In conclusion, BOYFRIEND, I will be hurt an disappointed if you don't get my anything. I don't want to feel like that, but as every girl at my office gets flowers sent to her desk, at every squeal of delight I hear on Wednesday, the worse I will feel until I get something overpriced too. I am weak minded and competitive. And I like diamonds.

Lots of LUV,
karin louise
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2 Comments:

Blogger Daniel said...

Luckily the Valentine's Day products are widely available in both expensive and reasonably priced forms, allowing both rich and poor to partake in this extravaganza. And perhaps Boy could get you a gift certificate. $20 at Tiffany’s doesn’t go that far, but it’s farther than you are today.

2:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like Valentine's day. However, I do not like roses. Well, maybe I am capable of changing that. I do not need any more chocolate but I like to eat it every time I walk by the candy jar at work which is very often on purpose. I also like getting calls from people asking for pizza delivery. Anon is back. he he

11:28 AM  

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