Stump the Punner!!

[Sorry for the delay on this, apparently I have a real job that takes up time.]

Jello there, Jigglers! (This was cheap, and I admit that!)

This week's entry is short and sweet & sour because I'm stuck in work-life balance purgatory BUT lucky for youze guyze, I made a list of wordplays, worksheet-style. I apologize for the extremely Stretch Armstrong (he makes bracelets just like Lance...really flexible ones!) nature of this post:

On Feb. 14 this year, I'm toasting to Bobby Valentino, a British man who polices (definition 2: to make clean and put in order ) music, after my own heart! 

(Interesting side note: Bobby Valentino, the American R&B artist goes by Bobby V or Bobby V-tino in the UK because there is another artist there who has been recording under the same name since 1975. Wikipedia said so! )

The McDonald's crime scene was covered in ketchup with fries buzzing all over the tender stripped chicken victims. The detective started to feel sick as he questioned the Hamburglar so he snapped, "We know you're responsible! Nugget to the point!"

I would imagine that a high-rollin' but family-oriented baller would write, "I do it for de guts & and de-lore-an  also my mama but also my wunnerful, one-in-a-million girlfriend, de Laurie Ann." (Even I de-groaned loudly at dis one!)

The temperature in the room is at the Fahrenheit of blistering heat. I Smellcius something burning. Oh. It's my face. Time to read some Kelvin & Hobbes comics to get my mind off the pain and cool off.

Before he passed, Aaron Spelling named a highway after his daughter called Motori Spellway, but the DMV changed it to Motori Speedway after several Hollywood-you-please mo-tourists complained. (They also complained about this sentence.)

[Leave your challenges in the comments for next week and be prepared for results done in a touchy-feely, new-age (there is no wrong answer), time-crunchy granola way!]