isn't she sweet?

this is what one of my myspace.com rory's sent me:

MOMS ON MYSPACE, A 17 year old girl got online to find her mother online! So she decided to start a quick convo with her mom... which would forever scare her...

Mom: Hey sweet heart! Are you having a nice time at your dads?
Girl: Yea, it's pretty cool! Ya know... considering he's not here! Hehe
Mom:Oh really?
Mom: Where is he?
Girl: He left a note saying he was going to the store or something like that.
Girl: Hey, you have a webcam now, don't you!
Mom: Sure do, Kenny bought it for me!
Girl: Cool! Try it out!
Mom: Alrighty...Girl:
Oh god mom! What are you wearing?!
Mom: New jammies, you like?
Girl: No way! Those are so out of style!
Mom: Aww... Oh well-
Girl: Hey mom... Is kenny there with you?
Mom: No, why?
Girl: ....Mom....Don't move... just stay calm.. there's someone in the door way behind you...
Mom: Don't scare me!
Girl: ..I'm not kidding... look in the reflection of the monitor... then slowly grab the phone and call 911....

Before her mother was able to reach the phone an ice pick was stabbed into the back of her neck and yanked all the way across. That's the last thing the girl saw of her mother- blood from her mothers throat splashed all over the camera. The only thing visible were shadows. She saw this person tear her mother limb from limb... All she could do was watch in horror as this shadow killed the only person she loved.Now that you know this information, that same shadow will be standing behind you in 5 minutes ready to kill you unless you spread this information to different people.I'd suggest you hurry up and repost MOMS ON MYSPACE

another video

this is all my. me me me. i don't think its that funny. but a friend emailed me this morning. and told me it was really funny. so i was all like, cool.

the office

i only wore one shoe around my office today. and no one said anything about it. no cares about me. you would think someone would be worried about me stepping on a tack or something.

video

i really love this video. i'm not in it. but i shot it and i editted it. and its not too long, like the other one.

Star Wars Planet List

Last night I called my older brother at midnight because I couldn't remember all the planet names from Star Wars. I compiled a list if this ever happens to you.

A New Hope

Luke Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi live on the desert planet of Tatooine. Which is also where Jabba the hut resides.

Leia was raised on Alderaan which Darth Vader blows up while torturing her trying to find the location of the rebel base.

Dantooine is the planet Leia tells Darth the rebel is base is on. He blows up Alderaan anyways.

The rebel hideout is on Yavin IV

Empire Strikes Back

Hoth is the ice planet.

Dagobah is where Yoda lives

Thought Han and Leia were flying through a planet trying to get away from imperial ships? Wrong. It was a dense asteroid field.

Cloud City, is on the planet Bespin and is run by Han's old friend Lando Calrissian. And is where Luke loses his hand to Vader, which I thought was on the Death Star, boy do I feel like an idiot.

Return of the Jedi

Coruscant is where Darth hangs out. It’s like the Imperial capital planet. Don’t go there. It’s not cool.

The moon of Endor is where the gang has to deactivate the shield that protects the Death Star AN where the e-woks live.

The new movies you ask? What about the new movies? My response shut the fuck up. Those movies blow. We all know it. The main reason I think they blow is because when I was in high school my older brother and his friends dressed up like the characters and tied an inflatable space ship to the top of the car. That was the ONE AND ONLY DAY I took the bus to school.

And also I just like the old ones a lot and I think the new ones ruin everything.

Holler.

Oh and everyone likes Boba Fett. Who do I like? Boussh. Do you know who that is? Guess. Or just look it up on the internet and tell me. The internet way is really cheating. But i looked up all those planet names on the internet so.... I will forgive you.

god damn blogging is a chore sometimes

i wasn't even going to blog at all today. but my last few blogs were barely blogs you know? they were more like fake blogs. like excuses of blogs. and i get pretty pissed at people who don't update their blog reguarly. i thought, who could not want to blog everyday? and now i realize people who don't have that much to say, or people who feel like keeping things private. the good news is that neither of those describe me. i love to talk and i am not very private.

i don't think things that are really long are funny. the video below is too long. i am in it. and i editted it. i should have made it shorter. i picked out the songs for it too. i like that it starts with "girls just want to have fun" and ends with "the boys are back in town." that is subtle book ends.

that paragraph was short, but not funny. but it would have been even less funny if i had kept going. see? i am right.

i can think of more things that aren't funny. like the fact that i have a cavity and it keeps my from eating some of my favorite foods. but i am absolutely terrified of the dentist, so i will just have to live with it. sometimes when i go home to visit my parents, my mom tricks me into going to the dentist. she tells me we are going to lunch or something. and then takes me to the dentist. i feel like a dog being taken to the vet. but once they have you in the car there's really no escape. one time my mom took me there and she had to run some errands. so i went in to the recptionist and told her that i had to cancel my appointment because i had another appointment. but when i went outside to sit on the curb and wait for my mom to get back. she was still in the car, organizing receipts or something, you know mom stuff. i tried to tell her they cancelled my appiontment. she did not believe me. i had to go back. and she sat in the waiting room the whole time. this was about year ago. i could legally drink alcohol and i lied to my mom about the dentist. he should go kill himself.

AND YES ITS A CAVITY YOU DUMB BITCH. STOP POKING IT WITH THAT THING! ITS A FUCKING CAVITY ITS A HOLE IN MY TOOTH AND IT HURTS. IT HURTS A FUCKING TON. SO JUST STOP FUCKING POKING IT.

have a great weekend. i am going to new york.

will this work?

let's see...

i didn't do anything at work today. is this for me?