I have thrown out there that I am most likely the Worst Girlfriend Ever, which would make sense because Boyfriend is as good as they get, and opposites attract.
And I can hear you right now, "karen hamburger, don't say that about yourself." Well, after this list your tuney toons will change.
THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER:
- I don't cuddle, but I do like to force Boyfriend to hold my hand in public
- I have a hard time sleeping, and I have a hard time when Boyfriend is sleeping and I'm not, so I wake him up
- I do things like call Boyfriend "my ultimate prop" and then proceed to lick his face
- I hog the remote control
- I stay late at work
- I make him hang out with people, when he just wants to be at home
- I like him to sit in the bathroom when I take showers so I can keep talking
- I DO NOT DO DISHES
- I think it's funny when girls hit on him
- I play music too loud
- I make him "show me how the waist fits" when he tries pants on
So, as you can see, I am a horrible girlfriend. And you should all be happy that I am off the market at least until Boyfriend reads this post.
Coldness and non-kisses,
karen louis hamburger